Lindsay the Libertine

Ah well, it is not too surprising to learn that little Miss Party Girl Lindsay Lohan (she who manages to mysteriously manage to hurt herself with the aid of only a teacup), has been showing up late to work on her current movie set, "Georgia Rule," in which she plays, another big shocker here, a troubled teen.

What is a little bit surprising, as well as mildly amusing, is that the 70 yr old CEO of the company producing her current movie wrote an upfront, no beating around Lindsay's bush, letter (read letter here) cutting through all the celebrity bullcrap and telling her to show up on time and get the job done right (article).

How refreshing! No, "Excuse me your highness Miss Lohan but, uhm, could you please, if it isn't too much trouble, uhm, perhaps, come to work when you are supposed to - NO offense meant but uhm, we have millions of dollars riding on whether or not you drag your 20 yr old lily white, hard partying butt out of bed each day so if you don't mind, if it isn't too much of an inconveinance, please do the work you were paid to do..."

No sir, Mr James G Robinson (also known as MY HERO) is 70 yrs old and taking NO bull from this Hollywood teen (Lindsay claims to be suffering from heat stroke, not poor work habits). More entertaining still is Lindsay's response to the letter, or lack thereof. Her mother Dina is up in arms insisting that Linday was overcome by the heat, not pissing off her responsibilities. Lindsay has made no public response to the letter, which was hand delivered to her hotel, Chateau Marmont on Wednesday, but has instead spent the weekend partying hard with her current boyfriend.

One can only imagine her devastated response to the scathing letter and slanderous attack against her character:

"Like I mean, god, who does that old dude think he is anyways? Like, I'm cool and people like me! I'm frickin Linday Lohan!!! HELLO!? I sell Proactiv and I am proud of it! I'd like to see him party with Nicole and Paris all night long!!? Probably wears man diapers! HAW! Fer sure, what a whacked old dude. Anyone got a line for me?"

I am not sure why this little sneak peek into Lindsay's crappy on set behaviours elicits such glee in me. Perhaps in is merely a case of schadenfreude (an affliction I often exhibit in regards to celebs) or perhaps I am simply envious that the little beast gets paid millions of dollars to make movies and she can't even bother to wake up in the morning to do her job (funny blog about this and other Lindsay antics).

Or perhaps it is the fact that I, too, suffer from an affliction which could be called flakiness or frequent tardiness and I am secretely terrified that someday someone like Mr Robinson will call me out on it in a public, painful fashion and I will have to answer for all my failures and flaws - oh the horror! And, unlike Lindsay, I will not be able to party the weekend away in mindless oblivion. Oh, the joys of denseness.

Oh just imagine the myriad of pleasures that must befall one who is bawdy, careless, debauched, depraved, devil-may-care, dissipated, dissolute, easy, extravagant, flirtatious, frivolous, gadabout, gay, giddy, immoral, incontinent, indecent, intemperate, lascivious, lecherous, lewd, libertine, libidinous, licentious, light, loose, lustful, profligate, rakish, reckless, salacious, self-gratifying, self-indulgent, sportive, sporty, unchaste, wanton, whorish, and wild.

Ok, I admit it, I am green with envy. You go girl!

And now for some fun with paperdolls, here are the Skel-fab Club girls, none other than Nicole Richie and Lindsay Lohan to lead us down that twisty, treacherous path to the land of the gadabout, wanton libertines where only squares show up for work on time!