Monday, March 17, 2008

I Love Lucy, and her Jaws of Steel

It began with my action figures, Chewbacca, Princess Leia, Baby Spice and then Scary. Incriminating legs, heads and glittery body bits sprawled across my living room floor.

OK I figured, I am an adult, what do I need plastic action figures for? I pried the left over hunks of plastic from her jaws and got a good laugh a few days later when I found Leia's disembodied head rolling under the couch.

I did not think my favorite orange Woolen Mills hat was as funny. Or my brand new pair of Keds, or the striped socks my mother brought me from Sweden. But when I came home to discover a chewed up ink pen, an ink-splotched beloved chair and a floor full of smudgy black paw prints, well, that was the last straw.

Not only does Lucy have dozens of fresh yummy bones to chew on, she has dozens of yummy chew toys. I try to rotate them so each one is new and exciting. She gets a long walk every day, dog park action, and loads of backyard time.

Not that any of this ever tires her out, she is like the Duracell Bunny and the Tasmanian Devil rolled into one. This girl's battery just never slows down.

Is she bored, resentful, petulant or do her jaws have a life of their own? Since I can't afford a dog psychic, I will just have to continue teeth-proofing my house and arriving home with baited breath:

"Lucy, you got some 'xplaining to do."

7 comments:

moshix2/aka: sachie said...

"I can has baby Spicez!!" ohh, Lucy you is so cute with Crawford. I am sure lucy loved your spice girls maybe bit too much???!! lol! somehow lucy look bit guilty in this pic...

Undead Molly said...

Isn't she supposed to be crated when you're not home? I don't know. I'm a cat lady... I know nothing of dogs.

I'm sorry your stuff got chewed. I'm sure eBay can help with les mademoiselles Spice.

Q_Monroe said...

uh oh. yes, put that dog back in a crate! she is in TRUU BuL!

I was up last night with a dog who couldn't POOP! ella was quite pitiful trying to squeeze somethign out. could have caused a prolapsed rectum -- jeesh! i bathed her last night at 1 am to try to loosen things up!

the things we do for these 4-legged (or 3, as my case may be) creatures!

gotta love them though!

your a good owner, i'm sure lucy thinks that every day.

xoxo,
suz

Eva the Deadbeat said...

Oh poor Miss Ella! Is she better today? My Lucy has been waking me up in the middle of the night for a bathroom break which is not easy feat.

What is TRUU BuL???

I was crating Luc but stopped because she HATED it and she was initially very good when left alone. I think she is in her teen years right now and testing her boundaries by eating everything in sight. Argh.

I wonder if Spice Girls taste good? And who is next on Lucy's Merciless Path of Destruction...??!

PS Today at the dog park Lucy got humped by her buddy Mecca (female) and THEN she humped her right back!??! My little girl is growing up! Sniffle!

mdouglas said...

Hey, thanks for the post! Anyone who says adults can't play with action figures is INSANE. Sorry about your plastic dismemberment incident. My cat has a fondness for my vinyl gorillaz figures, so I can empathize.

Eva the Deadbeat said...

Hey Matt! My cat and dog work like a well-oiled team. The cat knocks the action figures off the windowsills and the dog chews em up! What a bratty team! ;)

Your characters should be toys, I'd buy 'em even if Lucy eventually had her way with them!

Q_Monroe said...

Truuu BuL is trouble, but said really drawn out, with emphasis.

Ella is better.

ooh, teen years are bad. just wait till luce starts bringing home riff raff and DRUGS!!!

can't wait to see you this afternoon!