Ultimate Frisbee is Stuck in VT

Burlington Ultimate [74]

Seriously, these frisbee people are crazy!? They dash around the court like happy hop heads! I get tired just watching. Wish I was in shape enough to run after them because it honestly does look like fun.

When shooting this video I ran into about 5 people I have interviewed in other vlogs. Granted, this is a small town but still, that is a bit funny. Apparently, everyone you know and his brother all play ultimate. Well OK then!

Culture Shock Sunday

“To look at the cross-section of any plan of a big city
is to look at something like the section of a fibrous tumor.”
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Today I drove downtown for the first time since I've been back from California. It made me glad to be greeted by the breathtaking views of Lake Champlain while driving down Main St. Still, things do feel smaller here. It is sort of like my scope just shrank.

But I do not necessarily mean that in a bad way. San Francisco was almost too much for me to handle. Too much rushing, too much money spent, too many dates, too much eating, too much drinking, too much energy spent maintaining my force fields, weaving through crowds, ignoring bums and trying to stay on top of the ever-changing landscape around me.

In Vermont I can relax my force fields, breathe a deep sigh of relief and just...be. But I miss having a cell phone that rings a lot. And I miss having friends to see regularly. And it was nice to be unattached to a computer for 7 whole days, a little scary too.


Tonight at Selene Colburn's work in progress, "The History of the Future Suite" at the FlynnSpace, I saw a dozen or so familiar faces. They were from all sorts of different local places like VCAM, Pure Pop, SpielPalast, the Smittens, Kasini House, the Old Northender and the Flynn Center. Burlington really is a small town.

And right now, a small town is where it is at for me. But I can't help but miss the big town with the arched red bridge, the floating sushi boats, twinkling lights at night and the smell of salt water.

“The screech and mechanical uproar of the big city turns the citified head, fills citified ears - as the song of birds, wind in the trees, animal cries, or as the voices and songs of his loved ones once filled his heart. He is sidewalk-happy.”
- Frank Lloyd Wright

VT City Marathon is Stuck in VT

VT City Marathon [27]

Craft Goldmine Saturday!

If you live in Burlington, you are sure to be out and about soaking up this glorious weather all weekend. Additionally, you should definitely hit up the Queen City Craft Bazaar this Saturday at Union Station.

I know some of these crafty folks personally and their goods are absolutely mouth-watering and irresistible. So if you got some cash burning a hole in your pocket, spend your money local and support your crafty people!

Here is a Stuck in Vermont vlog I did in March about some of the participants. I was moved by the fire in their bellies, their obsessive need to create and their beautiful goods:



PS I only wish my crafty pal Nikolaas was here - we would have so much fun sorting through the goodies!!!

Happy Monday, M&%$er!

There is no feeling worse than walking bleary-eyed to your car and finding another car in its place.

Your mind races, "Did I park here?"

"Maybe I am on another street?"

"Did I ride my bike and space it?"

Once you backtrack and assure yourself that you did indeed park your car in this spot late last night, you realize it is one of two possibilities, you got robbed or towed.

This is the second time I got my car towed in Burlington and, like the first time, it was surprisingly not too awful (and was oddly around the exact same time last year).

But why is it that every time I get my car towed I am dressed entirely inappropriately?

Exhibit A: Note the same pair of fuzzy pink boots that must inspire tow trucks to nab me.

Last night they swept the streets of Burlington. Apparently, most people who live IN Burlington knew about this but living in South Burlington, I was totally clueless.

The city put up little yellow signs on 3 feet high sticks around town. Of course, the street I parked on did not have any little yellow signs but that didn't stop them from towing me.

I listened to the sweepers driving up and down the streets late last night and it made me think of the Bay Area where they have year round signs alerting you to street sweeping dates.

When you park anywhere in the Bay Area, you make a point of reading the street sweeping signs to make sure you don't get a ticket. They don't bother to tow you but who wants a ticket.

This is partly why I check signs so carefully when I park anywhere. I am trained after many years and many tickets in Oakland, Berkeley and San Francisco. I ain't no dummy. Well, a bit of a dummy.

This morning the City of Burlington towed my car down to the Coast Guard's lot at the waterfront and left a nice orange $95 ticket on the windshield. Am I contesting it, you bet your pink silly shoes I am.

It wasn't that far of a walk and it was an excuse to cuss out loud and stroll down by the water where the clouds were fittingly petulant and stormy.

From this day forth I will just assume that every time I wear my pink fuzzy boots and silly around-the-house-clothes, my car will be gone and I will have another towing adventure ahead of me.

Hopefully none of them will be as awful as getting towed in Oakland which will always be remembered as one of the weirdest days of my life (remember Nessa?!).

HOT ART Friday Night

Psst, hey you. Yeah YOU! Whachoo doing tomorrow night, eh? Going to an art opening? Going to two perhaps? That's what I thought you said. For a little town, we got a hell of a lot going on.

Tomorrow night you can see the art of Clark Derbes (he with the colorful art and infectious laugh who you may recall from this week's Stuck in Vermont) at the Pursuit Gallery and D.H.Phillips at JDK's Sanctuary Artsite.

All this AND it is the First Friday Art Walk so many artists will be opening their doors wide to visitors tomorrow. Zowie!

Sure, we may have snowstorms in April (Last night was crazy! Why didn't I take any pictures?!) but we got a sizzling HOT art scene with two Southerners opening up art exhibits tomorrow. Stop and bye and say hey y'all.

PS On another note, tomorrow I get to go to a tea party at Barnes Elementary! Perhaps while there I will make a plea to be accepted back into the 2nd Grade cause they really seem to have it made! Field trips, tea parties, dancing, singing, mobiles, abstract art, quiet time, reading aloud - sigh, sign me up! ;D

Hackie is Stuck in Vermont

Finally, another installment of my new vlog, Stuck in Vermont. Two weekends ago I spent a morning chatting with local author, cab driver, comedian and philosopher Jernigan Pontiac.

In addition to being highly entertained by his droll humor and getting a great tour of the area from a cab's-eye-view, I had an excellent time talking to Jernigan about life, art and people. It is not often that you find such a genuine, interesting, thoughtful soul and even rarer still when you get to have an on-camera chat with them.

It killed me to whittle my hour of footage down to 4 minutes (literally, it killed me, I am still in mourning) but at long last, here is the final bite-sized product, Stuck in Vermont, Episode 2, The Hackie.

I may have to follow this vlog up with Jernigan's tour of the area not to mention more Jernigan gems about writing and life and massive amounts of silliness. Seriously, this guy needs his own TV show. So beware another Hackie Episode 2.1 or some such thing.

The most awesome music is by C-Funk also known as Adam Cooper Wood and Chris Cheney. Remember to read the bi-weekly Hackie column in Seven Days and to buy the Hackie books here! Spread the word folks, a little dose of Hackie each day keeps the winter doldrums at bay!

Girls Just Want to Get Dry Humped by Strangers (Not)

Yes, yes, I know, what do I expect, right? I mean, I should have known better than to attend 80s night at the Retronome. But what can I say? I like to dance and there are not too many places in town to get your retro groove on.

Yeah! That's the ticket!

Sadly, Retronome plays CRAP 80s music. Their set list is so generic and tired that it makes you want to strangle yourself with a pair of striped legwarmers. Totally Bogus!

For example:

• Def Leppard - Sure, everyone loves "Pour Some Sugar on Me" but what about a less played track like "Animal"?
• Beastie Boys - God, if I hear "Fight for Your Right to Party" one more time, oh no, I just barfed a little in my mouth...
• Cyndi Lauper - I know "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" is standard fare at any 80s night but JESUS, of all the songs on that album, that one is my least favorite and hearing it repeated ad nauseam in underarm deodorant ads makes me want to jam a sharp stick in my eye!
• Salt-n-Peppa - For the record, "Shoop" is technically a 90s overplayed hit and the same goes for "Let's Talk About Sex" - get your decades straight!

Would it KILL them to play some truly trippendicular 80s music? I mean have a look at the Top 100 albums of the 80s and there is some stellar stuff on there: The Cure, The Smiths, Echo and the Bunnymen, David Bowie, Modern Lovers, Prince, Suzanne Vega, The Clash, REM, XTC, Elvis Costello, Talking Heads, Duran Duran, The Pretenders and U2.

Out of that entire bunch, Prince was the only guy who got some play and it was one of his less interesting hits. They did however, play "Thriller," "Back in Black" and "Sweet Child of Mine" - songs which never get enough play these days, right? Like, gag me with a silver spoon already!

Ah well, what are you gonna do? I ended up having a great time dancing with the girls even if I was dancing to tired old generic hits like "Don't You Want Me" and "Respect" (I still appreciate these songs, but PLEASE, they are SO TIRED!). And excuse me, but how is it possible that they didn't play ONE song by Madonna or The Culture Club? Like, fer sure!


All in all, the night was a bit like a high school flashback, equal parts fun and pain. All the elements were there: loud throbbing music, shots of So Co and lime, taking the stage by storm, soaking in the crazy light show and entertaining ourselves with synchronized dance moves to Tiffany's "I Think We're Alone Now" (which, I swear to God, they played not once but TWICE!!! That is one more time than I need to hear that damn song for the remainder of my lifetime).

Additionally, we had a swell time watching all the Retronome characters: the smelly guy who dances in circles by himself, the ASL guy who stands on the stage and does sign language-like interpretations of the songs to the crowd, the girls grinding up on each other, the couples grinding up on each other, the crowds of solitary, not-dancing dudes lining the dance floor and leering at the ladies, the masses of big flammable hair (where was my lighter?), the copious amounts of free flesh on display (so many push up bras!) and the drunken animal-like behavior. I wonder what Jane Goodall would have made out of it all?

There are uncanny similarities in the nonverbal communication patterns of chimps and humans - kissing, embracing, patting on the back, touching hands, tickling, swaggering, shaking the first, brandishing sticks, hurling rocks. And these patterns appear in similar contexts as those in which they are seen in humans. They mean much the same. - The Jane Goodall Institute

I even got to see two pretty girls making out next to me as a gaggle of men cheered them on. Two seconds later we were avoiding the fight that was about to break out when a clump of thick-necked gents got into a scuffle with security. But what the hell!? We didn't care 'cause we were dancing and the music was loud and it was fun trying to recall every 80s dance move in your dusty repertoire. Rad!

So all this said, it shouldn't really have surprised me when I felt a hand on my waist and turned to see this little grinning fellow suddenly attached to my ass. Apparently, this is also part of the Retronome scene, random strange men sidle on up to you and start grinding your rear. I detached myself quickly enough (after all, he was only half my size) but it left a sour taste in my mouth. Gross Me Out the Door

Twenty minutes later I felt another back end disturbance and spun around to see a taller boy in a striped shirt getting busy back there. I tried to move away and he followed me, apparently interpreting my revulsion as "dancing." As if!

"Help" I mouthed to Suzanne and she rammed into him. Not easily deterred, he attempted to attach himself to Danielle's butt as she reached down to retrieve her purse. One more shove from Suzanne and he was gone for good but first he tried to side swipe her and knock her down in what could almost have been a gnarly Molly Ringwald dance move.

Is it just me, or is this bad behavior? Sure, everyone was grinding and bumping and dancing like strippers but shouldn't you at least make eye contact with a random girl before trying to dry hump her? No Shit Sherlock.

Anyway, before we knew it, the last song of the night was playing ("Hit the Road Jack" gets the point across). The boy in the striped shirt had found a girl receptive to his gropings and they were frantically grinding and sucking face in a corner. Nice Play Shakespeare!

All in all, it was a fun drunken evening. And it does feel good to dance, sweat and get your groove on, even if the music is of the slightly sucky variety. And as we made our way back to the car in the freezing cold past the gaggles of drunks lining Main Street, we were thankful for the warmth of our coats and glad we weren't one of the hapless under-dressed girls wearing ONLY a tube top and a mini skirt 'cause that would fucking suck. Smooth move, X-Lax!

And now, to help clear the taste o' barf from your palate, here is some Echo and the Bunnymen and a totally awesome song to dance to:




PS And thanks to Margot and Scott for sitting through the flashback evening. Psyche! Hard to follow Pan's Labyrinth with a suitable activity but at least we weren't in Franco's fascist Spain, eh?? Like, that would be so totally heinous.

PPS Totally tubular 80s slang taken from this radical 80s Glossary.

So Fanciful, So Savage

Out of the bosom of the Air,
Out of the cloud-folds of her garments shaken,
Over the woodlands brown and bare,
Over the harvest-fields forsaken,
Silent, and soft, and slow
Descends the snow.
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Snow-Flakes

Come, see the north-wind's masonry,
Out of an unseen quarry evermore
Furnished with tile, the fierce artificer
Curves his white bastions with projected roof
Round every windward stake, or tree, or door.
Speeding, the myriad-handed, his wild work
So fanciful, so savage, naught cares he
For number or proportion.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson, The Snow-Storm


Announced by all the trumpets of the sky,
Arrives the snow, and, driving o'er the fields,
Seems nowhere to alight: the whited air
Hides hills and woods, the river, and the heaven,
And veils the farmhouse at the garden's end.
The sled and traveller stopped, the courier's feet
Delayed, all friends shut out, the housemates sit
Around the radiant fireplace, enclosed
In a tumultuous privacy of storm.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson, The Snow-Storm

DBCV12: VCAM Shoot

Seth had a great idea to make a VCAM (Vermont Community Access Media) commercial that will eventually air on local channels. So they asked some of their producers to come down and shoot some bits at the VCAM studios. Bill even blogged about it here and here (the second is a post about THIS post! PGUON).

Saturday was rainy and the sky was dark and overcast. Inside the cozy VCAM studios, Seth, Bill and Brad were working like busy bees to get each shot set up to perfection. My bit was pretty simple. I sat at an IMac and uploaded videos to YouTube. What, no lines?

The funny thing was, doing nothing was really hard to do! When you have a face like a clown and energy pouring out of your eyeballs, sitting still at a computer without making any faces is really tough! So if I make it into the final cut of the commercial, I will probably have an awkward pained expression which is what happens to me when I try to appear "normal" (just how does one do that anyways)?

The other amusing thing about this shoot was how professional it was. Each shot took much time to light and set up. This was especially humorous when compared to the final installment of The Offasty that we were shooting haphazardly at work last week.

Because we were in the process of moving offices, attending Xmas parties and "working," we had to shoot little bits here and there on the DL. In my head was a vague rough draft of the plot and I tried really hard to check off shots mentally and keep continuity roughly in check. Each of us took turns holding the camera, including my mom who happened to be there.

So the final scene has awful coverage, crappy ass lighting and is being held by a 72 year old hand. Still, we never would have managed to get this thing done if we had played by all the rules, lit properly, locked off shots and set things up perfectly.

I guess in the long run, I am more of a guerrilla filmmaker than a fancy professional. Granted, I know I need to learn the "right" way to shoot things so then I can actively choose to do things as I please. I hope to learn the "right" way to do things in school this year!

In the meantime, here is a vlog displaying this funny juxtaposition of shooting styles:

IT SNOWED!

“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so?
It came without ribbons. It came without tags.
It came without packages, boxes or bags.
And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store.
What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.” Dr. Seuss

Sigh.
It seems there will be no white Xmas for us this year...or will there be?

FINALLY! It snowed again! It was so exciting to peer out the window this morning to see, YES, a thin layer of snow covering the ground. I was even pleased to scrape my car windows!

By the time I got to work and finished our marathon staff meeting (my last one!), the thin layer of snow on the ground had melted already. NOOOOO!!!

Hours later, I glanced up to see little white flecks falling from the sky. FINALLY! More snow! Maybe there was hope after all!? Moments later a thick flurry had begun. I shouted to Suzanne to come and watch.

Mini-snowstorms are better than TV. It was mesmerizing watching the fatties shoot haphazardly every which way and the air was thick with powder. In the end, I couldn't resist running outside to dance around. That is what snow does to you, transforms you into a happy little kid excited by the simple things.

Moments later, the snow stopped and the air cleared. It is almost like the snow is playing hard to get, tantalizing us with little appearances but holding back the big guns for later.

What a naughty little minx! What a tease! A FLIRT! Well winter, you have wet my appetite and all I can say is, BRING IT ON!

“Sex is like snow, you never know how many inches you're going to get or how long it will last”

“The snow itself is lonely or, if you prefer, self-sufficient. There is no other time when the whole world seems composed of one thing and one thing only.” Joseph Wood Krutch

Winter Wonderland

“The future lies before you, like paths of pure white snow. Be careful how you tread it, for every step will show.”


“Hold fast to dreams, For if dreams die, Life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly, Hold fast to dreams, For if dreams go, Life is a barren field, Frozen with snow” Langston Hughes

“In any man who dies there dies with him, his first snow and kiss and fight. Not people die but worlds die in them.” Yevgeny Yevtushenko


“Courage is not the towering oak that sees storms come and go; it is the fragile blossom that opens in the snow.” Alice M. Swaim

“The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love.” Margaret Atwood

“When Christmas bells are swinging above the fields of snow, we hear sweet voices ringing from lands of long ago, and etched on vacant places are half-forgotten faces of friends we used to cherish, and loves we used to know.” Ella Wheeler Wilcox

“I frequently tramped eight or ten miles through the deepest snow to keep an appointment with a beech-tree, or a yellow birch, or an old acquaintance among the pines.” Henry David Thoreau

“So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their ending.” J.R.R. Tolkien



“How did it happen that their lips came together? How does it happen that birds sing, that snow melts, that the rose unfolds, that the dawn whitens behind the stark shapes of trees on the quivering summit of the hill? A kiss, and all was said.” - Victor Hugo