“Nobody ever defended anything successfully, there is only attack and attack and attack some more.”
General George S. Patton
Comments on my more "popular" YouTube videos often fall into a tiresome pattern: they begin friendly and supportive and then swing dramatically to
vitriolic hatred spewing evil. And once they swing this way, there is no going back to the light, it is only sulfurous denunciation and blistering criticism for as far as the eye can see. Ouch.
feed·ing fren·zy (plural feed·ing fren·zies): violent feeding by many animals: an intense violent period of eating that occurs when a large number of animals of the same or related species such as sharks or piranhas converge on a food sourceSometimes I wonder if the feeding frenzy is really just one person sitting at their computer monitor and posting as "deatheater," "billiejoelover," and "punkrockforeva" all at the same time (maybe it is the same evil doer/chubby computer nerd in the Southpark
World of Warcraft episode?).
What causes so many people to all of a sudden start attacking you? Is it some sort of instinctual fanboy pack mentality? Once the buffalo is wounded and down on the ground, the jackals rip out its entrails and strew them all over the sahara - that sort of thing?
The phrase "herd behavior" has acquired a certain currency in popular psychology, where the idea of a herding instinct is offered as an explanation of phenomena such as crazes where large numbers of people act in the same way at the same time. Such people are sometimes labelled with the derogatory term "sheeple." - WikipediaThis intense swing from good to evil comments has infected a large number of videos I've posted. At first I thought it was a fluke but now I know better. It started with my
Green Day videos. People were so nice at first and asking me if I could say hello to Billie Joe and thanking me for telling my story. Then the pure hatred began to spill out and I stopped bothering to read the comments, so inane, childish and rude were they.
FUCK THAT STUPID ASS WOMAN! SHE CAN SUCK A GUYS COCK! GOD BILLIE JOE CAN YELL AT HER ALL HE WANTS BECAUSE SHE'S AN ASSHOLE!
The same thing happened with my
Bai Ling video. The comments suddenly veered off on all these tangents about how hideously ugly I was with my Jewish nose and red lipstick. Hmm.
The last comment claimed I was racist (an ugly Jewish racist, apparently) which is probably a little bit true. Granted, that Bai Ling impression that I did was not so kind (and my Chinese accent sucked, I was more going for crazy lady accent) but COME ON, she is coo coo, that is why I LOVE HER! Oddly enough, this is one of my most popular videos?! Who would have thought Bai Ling had so many fans/defenders/Jew haters.
Bai Ling has a nice bod, but that's it. The ugly Jewish? girl presenting is annoying as fuck.
My
Britney Spears videos get A LOT of heat but I stopped reading those comments a long time ago. There were lots of teens defending Britney's pregnancy weight gain and asking how we would feel if we were fat and pregnant. See, the thing is, they missed the irony we were going for entirely but YouTube is not known for its shades of grey. It is odd that a white trash girl from Texas could inspire so much fanatic love and support from her blood thirsty fans but, perhaps that is part of her charm.
eew what an ugly narrating bitch, where does that thing get off dissing other people?! seriously with that bright red lipstick and big bug eyes make her look like sum crazy crack whore! and whats with the cheap lesbian video too? who cares if brit hasnt lost the weight shes still a great person so fuck off ugly crazy bitch!
My
James Frey video got TONS of mean comments which pissed me off as they were attacking my sister (you can call me a
big googly eyed freak but if you fuck with my sister, there is hell to pay!!). I secretly suspect that it is James Frey HIMSELF posting all these nasty snarky comments. That would be SO like him, staying up late, drinking soup from a can and posting nasty YouTube comments under different user names like "F*ckOprah!"
James Frey isnt a shitty writer, and leave Jen alone,
They both have more talent, and nicer voices in their pinky nails, than you would in an intire entourage of yours.
Thanks to my
Skel Fab vids, I had an awesome fight with a teen named Heather2006 (or was it a middle aged man in Wisconsin named Fred?? I will never know) about what a bitch I am for dissing Lindsay Lohan (she was ok with my dissing of Nicole Richie but back off the Lohan MFer!). More importantly, Heather2006 wanted to make it clear to me what a sad pitiful dorky loser I was for staying at home on a Friday night and playing with my paperdolls (pretty accurate Heather!).
you are gay
Oddly enough, after all our smarmy hatred back and forth, Heather2006 became strangely human and friendly to me...weird. It was almost like the human contact of our chatting chilled her out.
The case of animals evading a predator illustrates the uncoordinated nature of herd behavior. It can be shown that each individual can minimise the danger to itself by choosing the location and behavior that is as close to the center of the group as possible; this was the subject of a famous paper by evolutionary biologist W. D. Hamilton called Geometry For The Selfish Herd. The herd thus appears to act as one in always moving and acting together, but its behavior emerges from the uncoordinated behavior of self-seeking individuals. - Wikipedia
After all this acerbic hate so early in my meager YouTube career, I stopped posting videos that I knew would catch a lot of flack.
No more Britney, celebs (oddly enough, you can insult Brangelina and Jessica Simpson 'till the cows come home and nobody protests!?) or political stuff. I stuck to the less well known topics like artists and started making fewer celeb vids (got boring anyways).
This worked for a bit and the evil comments died down to a faint patter on my YouTube windowpane. Whenever I got a notification that there was a comment for any one of the vids mentioned above, I hid it away until a day when I felt strong and cocky enough for a good self-depricating laugh or two. Many were entertaining if nothing else.
A couple of episodes ago we did a piece on the British TV show
Peep Show. As usual, we didn't really plan out what we were going to say and hadn't even watched the show in a while so we were a little rusty on the characters names - I know! I know! Just one stop to Wikipedia and we would have been all set!
But I tried to make up for this lack of preparation by spending countless hours editing this puppy. When you are editing a show as good as
Peep Show, there are millions of good clips to choose from. I digitized hours of footage and spend about 20 hours or so wheedling it down to the 20 minute segment which aired on the show (complete with a hot hot HOT
New Order montage that still gives me chills).
It wasn't genius, it wasn't awful, it was just a moderately ok review of a great TV show. I posted in to YouTube and hoped other fans might have some comments and we could share our mutual love of Brit comedy. It all started out fine and dandy. My teenage Scottish pal quoted some of his favorite Peep Show lines and I quoted back. Nice comments from other fans.
Then the hatred began. And it never stopped, (
see all comments) it just kept on coming and coming and coming like a mad feeding frenzy and God help, me, I fanned the flames:
YOUTUBE PEEP SHOW BATTLElennylightweight (2 months ago)Those two women are terrible, how on earth did they get a job reviewing TV programmes. Great to see some US interest in what has been one of the greatest comedies from recent times, but come on, these two fish wives offer nothing of interest.jeanpierre86 (3 weeks ago)" There's uhhh Jaaa . . . Jez." You moron. you completely butchered the show. stick to watching friends or upn. doss cuntAmarnaMaru (3 weeks ago)I can't stand people like these two annoying cows. Acting like they discovered some show that's never been seen in America ever, because they're so intelligent or whatever, yet they don't know the names of the characters, actors, or even the story. Peep Show has been on tv is the US for quite awhile. It's called BBCAmerica, tools. I love that they act like the US wont get the show, or it'll be too shocking or whatever, yeah if all you ever watch is Friends or crap like that -Maruevadeadbeat (3 weeks ago)
thanks for your thoughtful insights! ;)
xoxo an annoying cow xoxo
AmarnaMaru (3 weeks ago)There are a lot of comedy fans in the US, who love shows from both sides of the Atlantic. At the very least, do a little homework! If you had bothered to look anywhere online, maybe you would have known the characters names at least. The reason this video bothers me is that it does a disservice to Peep show, and UK comedy in general. I don't want people to be put off UK shows, just because the reviewers were so lame. so, boo intellectual cripples! ... yah good comedy!AmarnaMaru (3 weeks ago)This is the part of the cream of UK comedy, they have bad/boring shows just like us. If you like UK shows, or you think you might, watch BBCAmerica, they show repeats all the time, other channels have UK shows as well. Then, get yourself a region free DVD player, and DVDs off AmazonUK. Its so worth it. Just please don't listen to people like these, who can simultaneously fulfill the myth that Americans are dim, while talking about how smart they are.evadeadbeat (3 weeks ago)thank you for all your thoughtful attention to these pressing issues!xoxo a dim American who enjoys British comedy xoxoPS why don't you edit your own Peep Show review! I'll be the first to watch it! The more, the better!quizzabella (3 weeks ago)Who are these two vacuous women? Peep Show is brilliant, but those two morons are doing nothing for the show with their inane commentsevadeadbeat (2 weeks ago)four words, MAKE YOUR OWN VIDEO!tomgude (2 weeks ago)Oh and these two ladies... well done on liking it, but fuck me are you annoying!
Many of these comments fall into the category of:
annoying-as-hell, hyper-critical fanboy mentality of, "How dare you attempt to be an expert on something that I know SO MUCH MORE about than YOU, piddly mortal! Pfft!"
"Fanboys" remain loyal to their particular obsession, disregarding any factors that differ from their point of view. They are also typically hateful to the opposing brand or competition of their obsession regardless of its merits or achievements. Wikipedia
Come on! We don't claim to be fucking Peep Show experts (there should be such a thing though)! We don't get paid for it, we do it because we enjoy it. We are just your average sort of fans expressing an interest.
And more importantly, make your own video assfaces! I'd like to see you spend 20 hours editing the little bitch, forgoing sleep and bathroom breaks!
Er, ehm. Oh my, I got carried away there. Thankfully, there has been a little ray of sunshine through all the cruel mist:
tragiccarpet (16 hours ago)Heh, we Brits really are protective of our comedies aren't we? Calm down chaps, even foreign devils can worship at the altar of British humour! I mean, I know we like to think it makes us better than every other nation on Earth (naturally), but lets try to be gracious in accepting their admiration. And come on, they are right about American sit-coms. Keep up the good work ladies!evadeadbeat (3 hours ago)yes yes, we DO worship at your mighty altar of British comedy! do not blame us for being piddly, pesky, inarticulate Americans with poor choices on the telly (the best we got is The Office and we stole it from you gents!). thank you thank you tragiccarpet for your kindness - from two foreign devils/birds/infidels!We love you tragicgcarpet, honest we do. And in closing, let's all lower our blood pressure with the ever charming words of Miss Betty White:
“Keep the other person's well being in mind when you feel an attack of soul-purging truth coming on."
Betty White
Rome’s working class, the plebeians had little individual power. 
queer..